farm girl

I need to be 'farm girl' I think. at least for a while. It's in my blood. It has always been who I am. I need to use my body, be with animals, grow things. Drive big tractors. Feed things. Make things. Sling hay bales. Take care of and fix things.

I am hunting around here for somewhere new, since it seems it is just too big to make a 'real' move right now... and I think if I stay here any more in this house, my soul will wilt too far. I need desperately to breathe, and be more in touch with the earth, and animals. I need to feed my soul.

We have been talking about moving for more than 2 years. I fear that in 5 years, I will still be in this house and nothing will have changed, except for me on the inside. I will be dead in there. So, I need to do something about it. now. NOW.

I am working like crazy to get a horse to ride, and that may be happening soon. But I need to move to a new house in the very near future, before my soul is any more sad. I am in the prime of my life to do something good. I need to make more of an effort to care for who I need to be. I am house/property hunting like crazy. I need enough property to have some animals.

I am hunting for some self-preservation. Can't wait to see what finds me!